On Blogger Popularity (& Privacy)

This dish was just not a popular one this week.

I tried making Mama Pea’s Pineapple Stir Fry, but I just wasn’t a fan. My vegetables were too crunchy, the sauce was overpowering, and I felt like I was drowning in pineapple chunks. Sometimes, a recipe just isn’t suited for your tastebuds – and that’s okay. Doesn’t mean it’s bad, just not your style. Same goes for certain bloggers.

I’ve been amazed since finding the blog and forum. I had no idea this existed until I friend told me I was mentioned in the bloggers they missed category. Of course, that made my day. It made me feel good to see I was actually missed (as it would make anyone feel, naturally). I think any human likes to be liked in some capacity, and even missed.

When I shut down my old blog, I wasn’t very vocal about this new space, and so it makes sense that people would think I just stopped blogging or disappeared. I didn’t. I’m here, waving my hand. I’m here, eating lots of different kinds of food (that you don’t see). I’m here, running several days a week and taking these really neat dance classes. I’m here, staying up much too late watching bad Netflix movies (that hasn’t changed). In many ways, I am the same person. But in so many ways, I’m not. And I needed a new space for my words and, more importantly, my new life.

Bottom line, I was just very, very tired of that style of writing. The more time went on, the more I felt like I was just trying to gain pageviews, leading me to blogger fame and popularity. I was jealous of the bloggers getting book deals, given my background and degrees in writing. Sometimes, I’m still jealous – even though a book from my blog wouldn’t be at all representative of the story I’d like to tell. Thinking back to the way I used to think and feel about blogger popularity makes me feel all ick inside. I felt almost obsessed with blogging back in 2008/09. It was really very unhealthy. In order to “fit in,” I thought I needed to assimilate and be like everyone else. That didn’t work in high school. Why did I think it’d work now? Throughout the midst of it, I lost track of why I was writing in the first place. It wasn’t a place I wanted to be.

Take that terrible attitude, a complete 180 life change, and you’ve got me quitting a blog. I’ve quit few things in my life, but that old space was something I had to let go. I didn’t feel bad. I knew those who cared would keep reading and following. Those who didn’t care – well, that’s just fine. The new digs may not be their taste, and that’s perfectly a-okay. I couldn’t forget the past and move on fully when I was constantly reminded of who I was, and who I was with. There are new people in my life, and they don’t need to see the past through a website housing thousands of photos.

Privacy is such a gift. That’s why I now keep it close, and I just don’t reveal everything.

I really like blogging now. I write what I want to write about. I write whenever I want. I include details about my life – but not everything. I read bloggers I care about. I comment if I have something to say. I just view if I don’t.

I like this new home. I think I’ll stay.

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21 Comments on “On Blogger Popularity (& Privacy)”

  1. October 26, 2011 at 4:00 pm #

    I felt the same way, about a year ago. Luckily, my blog was never 100% centered around a certain kind of writing so I felt comfortable morphing it slowly into what I wanted it to be. I love your new space!

    • October 27, 2011 at 9:14 am #

      And I love your renovated space. Isn’t it much better to just be open? Keep on writing, Ms. Kacy.

  2. October 26, 2011 at 5:05 pm #

    Agree totally! (About GOMI, privacy, commenting when you want to and not just for a backlink, writing a blog for the fun of it and not the popularity…)

    For me blogging is a place to be creative and write about things I care about. I will admit that some days I wish I had more readers or more comments or more whatever – but in the end, I would rather have a blog I love, than a blog with 1000s of readers where I feel like I can’t be myself or enjoy myself.

    Great post! :)

  3. October 26, 2011 at 5:41 pm #

    I guess we all blog for different reasons, and sometimes the reasons are obvious: self promotion, building a following, business. Others of us just do and if someone reads what we have to say, that’s a nice reward and sometimes even stimulates an online relationship. For me, the blog simply heightens my awareness of all that is around me and imposes a bit of a discipline. I write about things that interest me but am reluctant to share very personal things. My blog led me to you, and that’s been fun.

    • October 27, 2011 at 9:15 am #

      I like your structure, lulu. You’re right. It’s nice to have a place to record daily inspirations, thoughts, whatever you want to call them, and put yourself on some sort of regular schedule. For writers, it’s great to have deadlines like that, even if they are self-imposed. It gets you to ACTUALLY write, which is the purpose.

  4. Erin
    October 26, 2011 at 6:04 pm #

    I used to read OALP (in fact, you even gave me some very helpful advice on Catholic’s law school!), and found you again from Hangrypants a little while ago. I love the new space and attitude. I feel similarly to you on blogging and GOMI. I blogged for a little bit, and it didn’t work for me. I’m not sure what I’m trying to say…but I really enjoy this space and the blurbs about Pittsburgh as I live relatively close now!

    • October 27, 2011 at 9:15 am #

      OMG. Hi Erin! I remember you. I’m glad you found this space. Maybe if you’re in the ‘burgh, we could get coffee.

  5. October 26, 2011 at 6:58 pm #

    I love this Rose. I needed a new place for writing and wanted to do away with my old blog. It just felt like it was time for me to move on and start over. I’m not the same girl anymore either. (Well, I am the same in ways) I just want to feel less pressure. I’m blogging for me and if people want to read, fantastic!

    • October 27, 2011 at 9:16 am #

      I’m down with it, lady. I’ve always been a sucker for your words, so I was STOKED to find the new digs.

  6. October 26, 2011 at 6:59 pm #

    I absolutely love this blog. It’s sustainable, completely you, and shows a more human side…although I think OALP did too, in a way. It’s nice that you started with a template to experiment with, as it gave you the opportunity to discover what you really want to convey, and a means in which to do so.

    • October 27, 2011 at 9:17 am #

      Very well said, pie. It’s a building process, this blogging thing. Also this being a person thing.

  7. October 26, 2011 at 7:41 pm #

    I totally hear you on this topic! I started to get obsessed with hits and number of comments for a while and then realized how silly it all was. I blog for me, about what I want, when I want!

    • October 27, 2011 at 9:17 am #

      Amen, my friend.

  8. Laura
    October 27, 2011 at 12:08 am #

    I love it here too. :) I don’t comment nearly as much as I used to, but I’ve been following your journey all along. I can really sense how happy you are now, and that’s awesome!

    • October 27, 2011 at 9:18 am #

      Hi Hi Hi, Laura! You don’t need to comment – only when the mood strikes! Glad to know you’re reading and enjoying. Hope all is well for you.

  9. October 27, 2011 at 12:21 am #

    You know – I discovered you after reading about one of your books. I think it was Jenn (Eating Bender) talking about your beautiful oatmeal book you’d put together for her. So, in my world, you were a published author long before all the others. :)

    • October 27, 2011 at 9:13 am #

      HEAB! You are too sweet. You’re right. Sometimes I don’t give myself enough credit – I do have books out there!

  10. October 27, 2011 at 9:34 am #

    Up until recently, I very rarely commented on the blogs I read. I started to comment because in my head I would respond to what people were saying. It felt silly to have something to say and not say it. I really enjoy getting comments on my blog so I figured by commenting on other people’s posts, I make them happy too- and I like making people happy. I didn’t read your old blog, but I’m really glad I found this space.

  11. October 27, 2011 at 10:38 am #

    Amen, Rose. After over a year of trying to be just like all the other “healthy living bloggers” and writing about everything I ate, every day, I stopped. I couldn’t take it anymore, but I still loved blogging! I know I lost some readers, but I’m so much happier doing recipes and random posts about life and my puppy – it’s fun again, even when it takes up a lot of my time because that is time that I’m enjoying again.

  12. December 8, 2011 at 9:29 pm #

    Rose..I totally hear you! I just wrote a post the other day about being envious of others blogs. I had been getting sucked into the crazy blogging world. Constantly checking my stats for page views, and wondering how to get more people to come by. But just like you…I don’t want to find myself writing for others more than myself. I want to write for nobody but me and if someone happens to stumble upon me with an opinion…great. If not…that’s fine too. If we lose ourselves…we’ve gained nothing, and then….what’s the point ??

  13. December 15, 2011 at 2:14 pm #

    I found you Rose! Glad you are back to blogging and healthy “you” blogging. I feel you on wanting to remove yourself from that old life. I wish I could get rid of all of those happy posts from when I was with my ex, but for now I will just keep myself from viewing them. I’m so happy you are in a new relationship. Any dating tips for a single girl like me starting out again??

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