Right now I’m a little on the obsessive side about food. But this is a good thing. It’s not the measure-everything-out and restrict-yourself method. Instead, it’s an awakening in terms of what fuels these limbs.
[Veggie bowl with wilted spinach, 1/2 black beans in olive oil, 1/2 Jennie O Turkey Burger, lots of spices including my favorite right now: cumin]
I’ve been hard on myself over the past few months in terms of eating, and it has resulted in a strange cycle of eating diet and processed foods. It was almost as if I was transplanted back to 2004, when I knew very little about food and just wanted to “lose weight.” Over time, I saw that it just wasn’t working. I lost a bit of weight, but overall I felt pretty crappy. I was tired, sluggish, and easily getting sick. I just didn’t feel like myself.
But something shifted last week. I became more mindful. I looked at the foods lining my cabinet, and I was unhappy with the selections. I thought about all the fresh fruits I hadn’t been eating – and went directly to the store. I remembered the energy I used to channel (both physically and mentally) from cooking right after arriving home from work. I remembered how alive I used to feel when I would research foods and figure out the healthiest way to fuel my body.
So now, I’m trying to follow a more clean style of living. I’m sure I will falter. I’m human. I’m sure there will be days when I wake up and eat cheese sticks and a slice of pizza. My hope, however, is that those days are few. And instead of beating myself up when that happens, I’d like to think about the days I have eaten well. If those days outnumber the “bad,” then I should be just fine.